There are a number of ways to open but one PRIMARY objective. The objective: reach a hook and define yourself as interesting. How do I do this? I will explain in a bit. As for opening styles their is the direct approach and the indirect approach.
The direct approach has lately fit my style as I have plenty of social value at the venues I go to, automatically removing me from the"creepy" catergory. In order to derive success from your sets you have to set and maintain a level of congruence. This starts at your approach and follows through in the opener. For a direct approach I like to establish good EC( eye contact) and hold it as I approach the set. My direct openers range all the way from the infamous " hi, whats up?" to something as severe as "you are the hottest girl I have seen thus far since I've been in Dallas". Either extreme needs a good follow through and I will give examples momentarily. I usually stick with a comfortable opener, such as a compliment on something they are wearing or even their vibe by claiming that" I could feel it from over there".
My more direct openers always involve usage of NLP and a few other things. Dominant kino. If I establish EC on the approach and then they attempt to shut me out or turn their gaze as I near I will actually turn them towards me and as I open I will progress the kino escalation and lock myself in. It is important to uphold the congruence it takes to directly open a set. If you are offering the strong frame by being blunt you must immediately establish dominance. For instance how would it appear if you opened with "Youre definitely the hottest girl I have seen in a while..." and stood there hands to the side, no kino, and no lock-in? It would look weak and your opener would fail.
Now with an indirect opener you must also set your body language in tune with the style. I typically use indirect openers on warm-up sets or in unfamiliar venues. The verbage ranges from an insignificant question such as " Why are there guys dancing on stage", to a neg or tease such as "wooden shoes? Are you actually wearing those?". EC is not necessary on the approach but must be used after or during your opener. Also I make it a point not to crowd or come off too direct with my BL(body language)until i have reached a hook. In fact, i often shuffle or pretend to be a passer by as I take baby steps in the opposite direction.
Make it a big point to never follow a set unless you are IN with them. Some sets upon opening will start taking baby steps in the opposite direction and talk to you over their shoulder. It is instinct to take baby steps with them but you must refrain. Hold your frame and don't be scared to talk louder or also take baby steps in the opposite direction. There is an unspoken social pressure that will start to weigh on them and force them to turn around and come back. I call this the "Boomerang Effect" and I go into it extensively in my boot-camps.
Keep in mind that the opener/ gambit is just a line or question you throw out there to get their attention. Though it holds little weight calibrate your openers to acceptable standards. Open with hugs, dance with them, or grab breasts if your frame is strong enough. Though a goal you should have is to assume instant rapport, refrain from ragging on her like you would another guy until a later date. You want to essentially calm down their defenses not raise them in any way.
Another Day 2
15 years ago
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